Out With The Old,
In With The Newb
So far, the new year is shaping up to be a significant improvement over what I saw yesterday. Ah, sunshine, how I have missed you. I would comment how seeing you instils multi-orgasmic rays of sunshine in my stomach, but that sounds both redunant and scary. (As far as the Discovery Channel has told me, orgasms are not yet solar-powered.)
Last night was spent in the company of a few movies, a lot of alcohol and the beginnings of a hangover I am happy to say is currently just a mild nuisance of a headache. This morning was spent in the company of Mel, who had curled up into me (and pinning my arm beneath her in the process) and our Shih-tzu on the other side of me...hogging my entire pillow. While I love Shady to pieces, I don't exactly rank "waking up to a dog's furry butt in my face" high on my list of
boy, isn't this a great way to start the day?Anyhoo, I look forward to this year with great optimism. Fics will come to a close, stories may begin anew, The Project whilst being pushed back slightly is still on track, and the theory goes that the mall will be suddenly find itself akin to a ghost town. At least in comparison to last week, which was almost as busy if not busier than the week before Commercialmas.
As a result, I really must classify last week as: monkeyfuckbutter bad. Now bear in mind
monkeyfuckbutter needs to be read and taken as a whole, since dividing it up into its three component nouns sounds a lot like something you get when you're about to lose at a game of Google Seppuku. But as a whole entity,
monkeyfuckbutter is a great, spontaneous vulgarity
you can both impress your friends and horrify your parents with.
In other news, the following conversation transpired a few days ago as Mel & I ventured into a random Walmart:
Mel: "Wow, this place is identical to the one in Brantford."
Me:"I'll say. You can't tell the two apa--oooh, cookies!!"
[Cue me suddenly veering off to a giant wall display of cookies.]
Mel: [sigh!] "You are such an idiot."
Today's Lesson: the coolest explosions in the universe are the ones we'll never see. (Stupid millisecond-pulsars...)
posted by Phillip at 8:07 AM
